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Di dalam kehidupan rumah tangga bapak dan ibu, pasti mengalami dua kondisi psikologi anak-anak dalam menghadapi sekolah.
1. Anak-anak yang merindukan sekolah.
2. Anak-anak yang tidak suka bersekolah. Hampir setiap orang tua, selalu menginginkan putra-putrinya bersekolah, supaya sukses dengan segala cita-citanya. Tetapi tidak semua anak memiliki rasa yang besar dengan sekolah. Ada sebagian anak bahkan banyak sekali yang ketika bersekolah, menjadi tidak bergairah. Ada rasa terpaksa pergi ke sekolah. Bahkan orang tuanya sampai emosi, marah, dan memaksa anaknya agar mau ke sekolah. Bahkan dengan berbagai ancaman serta sumpah serapah negatif, karena anaknya tidak mau sekolah.
Tentu ada sebab, mengapa anak-anak malas ke sekolah? Begitupun, mengapa anak-anak bisa bahagia pergi ke sekolah?
Jawabannya hanya 1, karena mereka menemui sesuatu yang mereka inginkan. Ketika mereka puas dengan keinginan hati, itulah yang di sebut bahagia. Jika mereka tidak menemukan sesuatu yang mereka inginkan, biasanya meraka menjadi malas, lemah semangat, hilang gairah.
Ketika mereka menemukan atau mendapatkan apa yang mereka inginkan, maka anak akan merasa ikhlash. Persoalannya, orang tua di masyarakat selama ini, sudah menjadi konsensus, bahwa titah mereka wajib dituruti. Tanpa memberikan kebebasan anak untuk memilih dan memutuskan berdasarkan hati nuraninya masing-masing. Tentunya banyak hal yang perlu dipertimbangkan, agar anak memutuskan sesuai hati nurani. Artinya, pendekatan dan arahan jelas berbeda berdasarkan kriteria sebagai berikut.
1. Berdasarkan usia
Anak usia balita saja, harus diberikan kebebasan memilih. Jangan selalu dipaksa harus apa kata orang tua. Contoh urusan makan saja, mereka harus diberikan opsi, “Adik mau nasinya sedikit atau banyak?” Jangan dipaksa harus makan nasi ukuran sekian sesuai keinginan orang tua. Karena porsi tiap anak berbeda. Kondisi hatinya juga belum tentu sama terhadap menu tertentu di waktu yang berbeda. Kesehatannya juga mempengaruhi selera makan. Apalagi anak usia yang lebih besar, tentu sikap kita juga harus lebih berbeda. Biarkan anak-anak semenjak dini memiliki kemampuan memilih, dan kemampuan memutuskan berdasarkan dirinya sendiri.
2. Seberapa besar input atau informasi yang diterima.
Anak-anak jangan biarkan memutuskan perkata, sebelum mereka menerima informasi yang benar. Oleh karenanya untuk memilih segala sesuatu biasakan memiliki kemampuan literasi dan berbagai informasi yang akurat. Bila perlu diajak observasi terlebih dahulu. Jangan sampai otoriter, orang tua semena mena berkata, “Kamu harus masuk pondok pesantren.” Atau “Kamu harus masuk sekolah pilihan ayah dan ibu. Sekolah pilihanmu itu tidak bermutu.” Bisa jadi data yang diterima anak, lebih detail, karena mereka sendiri yang menginginkan sekolah tersebut.
3. Adu argumentasi yang baik dan benar
Sebagai orang tua yang berpengalaman, tentu harus bijaksana dalam memberikan arahan, jangan merasa benarnya sendiri. Sehingga sang anak tidak mempunyai kesempatan menyampaikan pendapat. Apalagi menolak. Oleh karenanya berikan kesempatan untuk berdialog, atau berdiskusi. Berikan argumentasi argumentasi yang bisa diterima anak dengan baik, bahkan ikhlas.
4. Bermusyawarah dan berdiskusi apabila ada perbedaan pendapat
Berikan kesempatan anggota keluarga yang lain, untuk terlibat dalam musyawarah bersama. Karena suara anggota keluarga yang lain akan menjadi pertimbangan keputusan yang bijaksana.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala berfirman: “Serulah (manusia) kepada jalan Tuhanmu dengan hikmah dan pengajaran yang baik, dan berdebatlah dengan mereka dengan cara yang baik. Sesungguhnya Tuhanmu, Dialah yang lebih mengetahui siapa yang sesat dari jalan-Nya dan Dialah yang lebih mengetahui siapa yang mendapat petunjuk.” (QS. An-Nahl 16: Ayat 125)
ادْعُ إِلَى سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِالْحِكْمَةِ وَالْمَوْعِظَةِ الْحَسَنَةِ وَجَدِلْهُم بِالَّتِي هِيَ أَحْسَنُ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن ضَلَّ عَن سَبِيلِهِ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِالْمُهْتَدِينَ
5. Pemenuhan kebutuhan psikologis yang baik dari orang tua dan lingkungan.
Anak-anak yang terpenuhi kebutuhan psikologis, misal kebutuhan diperhatikan, diberi kasih sayang, ketenangan hati dari orang tua dan lingkungan, mereka lebih baik akhlaqnya. Mereka lebih bahagia hidupnya. Dan mudah beradaptasi. Tetapi anak-anak yang belum selesai dengan persoalan keluarga, persoalan jiwanya, mereka akan cenderung memberontak atau membikin ulah, dimanapun mereka berada.
6. Kondisi fisik yang sehat jasmani dan rohani
Anak yang sehat jasmani dan rohani, sudah pasti memiliki pikiran yang jernih, badan terasa nyaman. Mereka akan mudah berinteraksi dalam pergaulan. Mereka senang dan bersemangat menuntut ilmu. Mereka akan senang bersekolah.
7. Memiliki cita-cita dan tujuan yang jelas dalam hidup
Ada banyak anak-anak yang bersekolah, masih belum mengerti tujuannya apa. Apalagi cita citanya apa, juga belum tahu. Ini tugas orang tua dan guru mengetahui bakat, hobi serta passion anak semenjak dini. Sehingga mereka mudah diarahkan karena sudah memiliki kepastian pada dirinya. Dia sudah mengerti korelasi sekolah dengan cita-citanya sudah nyambung. Orientasi sekolah nya seperti apa dan bagaimana, mereka sudah faham.
Pada suatu hari, saat saya mengisi Pengajian ibu ibu, di Masjid Ahmad Yani, Jalan Sidoyoso Surabaya, ada seorang ibu bertanya, “Ustadzah, bagaimana ya caranya, agar anak- anak saya biar bersemangat sekolah, karena saya capek, setiap hari selalu marah-marah, agar mereka mau pergi ke sekolah. Sepertinya anak-anak tidak senang ke sekolah.” Kemudian saya menjawab, “Ibu, biasakan anak-anak, melakukan amal apapun, termasuk sekolah, dengan ikhlas. Jangankan anak-anak, orang tua saja kalau tidak ikhlas juga akan berat melakukan amal sholih-sholihah. Orang kalau sudah ikhlas, maka memiliki sifat bahagia. Dia akan senang melakukan amal tanpa disuruh. Mulai saat ini, ibu jangan pernah marah, ikhlas, maafkan mereka, mulai membangun keikhlasan dalam diri kita masing-masing, bangun hatinya, karena bahagia dan ikhlas letaknya di hati mereka.” Rasulullah bersabda dalam hadits yang diriwayatkan dari Abu Hurairah, yang artinya: “Sesungguhnya Allah tidak melihat rupa dan hartamu, tetapi Dia hanya melihat hati dan amalmu”. (HR Muslim)
Nabi SAW menganalogikan amal yang dilandasi dengan ikhlas dalam hati seperti bejana. Dari Muawiyah RA, ia berkata bahwa Rasulullah bersabda dalam sebuah hadits.
إِنَّمَا الْأَعْمَالُ كَالْوِعَاءِ إِذَا طَابَ أَسْفَلَهُ طَابَ أَعْلَاهُ وَإِذَا فَسَدَ أَسْفَلُهُ فَسَدَ أَعْلَاهُ
Artinya: “Sesungguhnya amalan itu seperti bejana. Jika bagian bawahnya baik maka baik pula bagian atasnya. Jika bagian bawahnya rusak, bagian atasnya pun rusak”. (HR Ibnu Majah)
Semoga tahun ajaran sekolah putra-putri ayah ibu semuanya, dimudahkan Allah. Menjadi anak-anak yang selalu ikhlas beramal. Khususnya ke sekolah menjadi riang gembira penuh semangat. Aamiin Yaa Robbal ‘Alamiin.
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